Saturday, September 19, 2009

being Jonathan's brother

Adam and I had a conversation today.
A serious one... he was getting dressed for the Fair, and he was dragging his feet.
I could tell something was wrong so I asked him gently.
He started crying, saying he didn't want to tell me.
Immediately, I was doing a running inventory of things he might have broken.....
but after hugging me, he whispered in my ear, "I don't want Jonathan to go to the Fair with us."

So I sat on the floor with him and we talked it through.
How Jonathan is the son that God chose for me.
How Jonathan was a part of his family, and always would be.
You see, Adam is the only "normal" (and by that, I mean typical, non-FX affected child in our family) because truly no one in our home is normal.....
But I could see it weighing on him.
he was still crying, saying he didn't want people staring at him.
That he wants to yell at people for staring. (I feel like that sometimes, too....and I told him that.) I told him that people stare because they don't understand, or Jonathan bothers them.

All in all, it was a good talk.
Adam and Jonathan are 14 years apart and worlds apart in other ways.
But brothers nonetheless.

This is one of my favorite photos of my sons. I don't even care that it's blurry. That moment lasted all of 3 seconds, but I'll treasure it FOREVER.


Today, Jonathan was helping me photograph some stuff on the porch and HE ASKED me to take his picture. He ASKED.....that never ever happens. So I happily obliged.
Does my son have some beautiful blue eyes or what?
It's too bad he has serious gaze avoidance, he could rule the world with those baby blues.....

I am both blessed and challenged by my kids.
Who isn't......?
But far more blessed.

2 comments:

FXSmom said...

My oldest boy has a hard time with Matty going some places too. It is embarrassing and hard on them. But I think it the end it definitely builds character in our kids. It's never easy. And brothers always have moments where they don't want the other around. So in a sense this is normal...well as normal as our lives can get...lol.

Kristiem10 said...

My niece is like this sometimes with her brother. He has huge meltdowns, and you don't always know when they are coming. She gets embarrassed. But like FXSmom said, it builds character. I really like the picture you posted of the brothers. It is a sweet moment.